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Analogue Girl in a Digital World.....
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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in bzzzyb's LiveJournal:

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Sunday, February 12th, 2017
2:08 pm
Thoughts on Bounderies
have been happening a lot here in the house. No, nothing is going wrong with John and I, we're A-Ok. No, this is just in general, and brought on by conversations with friends, family, and the political climate of this place. For the longest time I thought boundaries were things you put into to place to tell others how to behave. "You will not" and " You are not allowed." Over the years I have changed that slightly. People tend to not like being told how they have to behave. And there are always those folks that will, upon seeing said boundary, feel compelled to haul ass over that line just to prove a point. Even if it's detrimental to themselves and their relationships. Now, instead of viewing them as ways of controlling others, I choose to see them as indicators of what you, yourself, will not do/tolerate/whatever. "I will not". First example. I have a friend who went thru a fairly hateful divorce. His now ex wife was and is a piece of work, and even now, 3 years on she is still in his life. But Bee, you say, they have a kid, of course she will be in his life. Yes, they do and yes, because of the kid he can't cut off all ties to her. However. She is CONSTANTLY showing up about dinner time to "visit" and by that I mean, get food. *ANY* problem she has, that has nothing to do with the kid at all, she is on the phone to him and demanding he "do something". She even has this *lovely* habit of calling him on the weekend and saying "Where are you, you're not home, I'm in the driveway." She does this because she got what she said she wanted but really didn't, a divorce. ANd now, she has no friends, and she's *bored* So, let's just make him entertain me. Um........no. So I asked him, why on earth have you not set boundaries? And his response was "How do you set boundaries with someone that refuses to respect them?" I told him he was mistaken, that these boundaries are not for her, but rather, for him. He needs to decide what *he* finds acceptable behavior to allow in his life. As an example, I said, point out to her that her showing up constantly unannounced and uninvited is annoying, and you want it to stop. He said then she doubles down on it and says basically you can't tell me what to do, you're not the boss of me...... and I said no, you're not. So you tell her this. You are, of course, welcome to make any decision abut your behavior that you want. However. I am telling you that *I* will do this set of things *if this* happens. And one of those things needs to be having the nice police officer help you leave the property. Of course he said great, then she will pitch a fit. Why? I mean, you *told* her what your reaction would be. She made a CHOICE, and *you* stuck to YOUR boundaries. You're not telling her she can't do this at all. You're just stating what your reaction would be. He's learning and getting better about it. I only hope that it gets to where he needs and wants it soon, for his blood-pressures sake.

What's interesting here is that so many folks seem to be doing this. Or maybe they always have and I've only just been made aware of it in the last 10 years. "I want this person to not be like this", " Why are they not doing as I say?" essentially "OMG WHY CAN I NOT CONTROL THEM??!!??!?!?" As I pointed out to my niece long ago while she was going thru her divorce, and recently when she was working on her OkCupid profile, you can not ever control other people, you can only control your OWN reactions, and inform them in advance of that. It's why my own insanely long and really scathing OKStupid profile read the way it did. That way, any choice they make is done with full information, and they can't come back with "But I didn't knoooooooooow". Amusingly the ones that seek that control are usually the ones that will Flip.The fuck.Out if you try to control them. What's also amusing is they fail to see that they are in essence *being* controlled by the person that is forcing them to disregard their personal boundaries. You just spell out what behaviors you are not willing to tolerate and you back that up with actions. You're not controlling them, you are controlling you. It's a very slight but exceedingly important difference I feel.

John and I had this issue with his mother. It has slowed down a lot but even still, it tries to rear it's head. She had, and has, this idea that she can do whatever she wants, whenever she wants, and that behavior was displayed quite clearly while he was living at the other house. When I, being me, called her on it, she flipped her lid, went on about being controlled, and started to step up her behavior. This of course lead to a big fall out, the end result of which was John up and bought a house and moved out leaving her holding the bag. Boundaries. She pushed against his, thinking he would bend his rules for himself. She was wrong. Now that we live in this house, she has tried on a couple of occasions to just come over whenever she wants. A spectacular example of this was about a year ago, when she *insisted* on bringing him luggage. We have luggage. We didn't *need* or want any more luggage, but she was cleaning out her house and felt he should have it. ( another thing that annoys me to no end, she was and is constantly trying to foist things on him that she doesn't want. In some cases it's literally absolute junk, as tho that's all he is deserving of.) At 9 am. On a Saturday. Because she happened to be in the area. With luggage in the car. Did I mention that she lives 40 minutes away? So, she didn't *happen* to be in the area. That is a tactic she (and others) used a LOT at the other place, calling to " make sure it's OK to come on by....." As she was pulling into the driveway. John was informed after the minivan tour incident at the other place, ( a story unto itself) that I would NOT tolerate this behavior. And that if he wanted to allow it, that was fine, but I would have a reaction to it, and then I spelled out said reaction. John then weighed the information and made his choice based on that. And she was kept outside on the front porch and not allowed inside. Which was the main reason for her to come over. It was KILLING her that she wasn't able to come in and do as she pleased. Yesterday she tried to pull it again, with telling him she has a gift for him ( these things always have a gift attached somehow or an *emergency!!!!!* because I guess no one ever refuses a gift or an "emergency"? In any case...) so she'd just come on by with it this morning and they could have lunch! John said "How about I come there, since where you live has a much better selection of lunch places, and that way, you don't need to drive out of your way. Plus, it let's me use the van to check how it runs before I head out on this trip next week." She tried again to get him to let her come out here, but no dice. If she wants to see him, this is how it has to be for now. John knows my boundaries with regard to her, and he has chosen to respect them. I also know his boundaries with regards to her. Which is why I never try to stop him from seeing her when he occasionally chooses to do so. Instead, we have it worked out. He can see her when he wants, but I get to have my home be a sanctuary with out her forcing her way in. It works.

In house stuff, lest you think this is all some sort of philosophical posting, and yet still maintaining the boundary theme, the room is coming together downstairs. I've just a curtain over the doorway for now, but that will do. It's more of a dust barrier really than a hard and fast KEEP OUT thing anyways. In time there will be a proper door so that space can be used as a guest room of a sort if we wish, but for now, I have a nice room for me and my doings. I just need to keep sorting things in it. I want to put sealant on the floor and perhaps that garage spray flooring to help make it not only look nicer but to help keep it from having a wee seepage issue when we get a lot of rain. That's going to have to wait tho. I also need to figure out some means of deer fencing for the garden space. Putting a garden in will be a waste if the stupid deer get their mitts on it before it even has a chance to grow. In a perfect world it would be a nice pole and wire fence with vineing food growing up on it, but, as I am broke ( yay traffic ticket) I'll have to make due with some of that cheap crap plastic fencing netting stuff. One day I'll have that yard whipped into a proper food forest and then I'll not mind the deer snacking, since there will be enough, but until then the little shits need to keep stepping. Anyway, it's a beautiful day here, house is open and airing out and it's warm but breezy outside, so I need to get moving on cleaning up outside stuff while I can.

Sunday, January 22nd, 2017
12:04 am
Today, bits
bit back and were not grabbed by anyone. I did not get to any of the marches here, but my god.....I cried seeing the pictures. Seeing so much support, hearing folks say enough is e-goddamned-nough was moving. Of course, there are trolls and such, but I am biting their faces hard and then going on enjoying this moment. I could post a lot about the current political climate, and perhaps I will but, Iam trying to get back into the habit of blogging and din't want to give myself an ulcer right off the bat. We have 4 years for this shit, assuming they don't give L'Enfant L'Orange the boot, so plenty of time for all that. On to happier stuff. In todays jaunts, I went with John to the Scrap exchange in Durham. WOW. just....WOW.  56.00 later.....yeah I went a bit ham, but my god. I am SO looking forward to having this room worked on and finished so I can start creating. They have SO. MUCH. COOL. SHIT. I need to see if there is one closer to me, tho in retrospect that could be a bad thing :D still tho...... Tomorrow I am going to grab a new paint tray as my old one has a split in it, as well as sand and cat litter. Painttry so I can get more done in my new room and start putting things up in there, sand is for the front walk. It's brick, and the weeds are coming in nicely :/. So, I have tp pull them out and then sweep sand over the holes left so they are filled in and there's no open hold for rain and so on to get in. I expect I will be having a non stop fight with the weeds in that walk this summer, but hopefully this will slow it down a bit. Also need to get 12 x 12 pavers for the green house so there are stepping points in it. Cat litter? well...cats crap. A lot. and 7 cats crap 47 times as much. It's weird math, but there it is. Little shitballs......

Back to grabbing ( not pussy) and sorting.....

Wednesday, January 18th, 2017
11:20 am
House tales
Yesterday and the day before I unexpectedly had off. Of course with the first day, my body decides to punish me by giving me a massive headache for first part of the day. No good deed and all that. But that faded finally and I was able to get laundry and cleaning done. General work stuff that needs to happen fairly regularly don't you know. Stuff that I have a difficult time getting done generally, because I have a severe lack of time, and a boyfriend that loves using all the pots and knives to make water. >.> This of course lead to our discussion of my needed to take a little step back and start actually scheduling time off. It's a much needed thing and I did it, with only a couple of folks being concerned. Honestly, I make the post on FB and I get pmed " OH NO!!! YOU"RE QUITTING?!?!!?" Ok first off....was there even a "q" in that post? and secondly I told you I'd be doing this like 5 months ago AND that you're not going to be impacted by it. *sigh* But, I understand it. I fill a need it seems for folks and one thing I know is people do not like to have their needs interupted. This makes sense so I'm not too fussed about it. A little hand holding and hugs and all is calm now :)  The other part of my needing to enforce time off is the house. It's an older home, 1955 or so, and it needs work in some areas. Plus it's on 1.3 acres, and THAT is going to need work. Grass doesn't care if you're tired, that shit still grows. Plants, the ultimate in no fucks given. Of course the goal here is to eventually eliminate the grass almost entirely and have plants that are food based, a small food forest is my goal here, tho I know that will take time. It's amusing, I tell folks this and I get " That's going to take a long time you know...."  Well...........yes. I know. Plants grow fast, but not that fast....Which is why I want to start *now* but, baby steps. Plus, if I want to get this to a self sustaining level for when I can't do the heavy lifting and such, I need to get it cracking now while I can. I did a check yesterday on the few guys I put in containers on the deck last year. Catnip is coming back and I expect the thai basil will too.  The malibar spinach will as well, just not yet. The sage and some of the thyme overwintered well ( and I did like NO covering or maintenance of this, these planters were strictly an experiment) and my grape and goji berry plants will be needed to be transplanted soon here too, they are not going to be happy in a bucket this season. The mint and rosemary are going fine, because see earlier, no fucks. Trying to find a good place for the grapes is going to be problematic, not because of a lack of space, but John has a dislike of things interupting the grass mowing. His theory is that, if he MUST mow grass, it needs to be with as little interuptions and swerving as possible. He might spill his beer. :P  I am considering in the front of the house, along our drive.  There's like....a drop there, that has railroad ties along it that I think would be pretty with some sort of trellis set up, and it faces southish. Plus it would help stabelize the ground there. Not that we're having issues with that yet, or hopefully ever, but still. It would visually cut off that bit of the drive but, * shrug* it's a driveway. There's not much to see really. And, since I generally mow the front of the house with the push mower, it wouldn't bother me. Of course I also have to remember that I'd be the main one tending the plants, as John is very uninterested in that sort of thing for now. He likes walking out back and eating the figs and blueberries off the bushes ( who doesn't really) but that and mowing is about the extent of the yard/plant care he's willing to do. And that's fine because he does *plenty* of other stuff around here, like construction and car repair and things of that sort that I could do, but really I have noooooo desire to. WOO compromise!!!!! Ok, now to get to work, get done, get home, and keep working on the new room that was put in the basement by John for me. Maybe I'll write more about that this next post. I'm just trying to get back into the habit of journaling here so, pretty scatty but eh, you'll live. Or not. I dunno.

Tuesday, January 17th, 2017
1:09 am
Long time
no post. Like, years. Oh well, time flies and all that. Some of it's been fun, some hasn't. I suppose that I'll cover some of that as I go forward. Why am I posting here again after a coon's age? Well, I really noticed over the last few months that I missed the "quietness" of LJ. And recent idiocy on facebook made me realize that while, perhaps the quality of folks on LJ are not different in general, the writing is. And the fact that it's more......in depth. To me it seems at least. FB is so fast and BOOM HERE ARE MY THOUGHTS ON THAT so THERE!!! whereas here, it take more time to write...and the responses are generally more thought out. Which isn't to say that this doesn't happen on FB, it does. It's just not as common. And I'm getting rather tired of that. Perhaps it's age? Meh, dunno. And really, I'm not doing this "for" anyone but me. I guess this will be a multi purpose blog, you know with things like tracking home improvement, gardening attempts ( woo blaque thumb), crafting crap, thought gathering and general bitching about life. without the overwhelming political spam and the rest of it that FB seems to be mostly comprised of these days. Good and bad bitching. As a super fast rundown, there was a bad patch, but then a good one, another bad one, and ok one, a good one, bad things during the good one ( oh hellooooo smother in law) but now it's honestly a great one :) Not that it was super bad before or anything, but comparitivly. I'll be posting refreshers on stuff here so I can keep it all in a spot, tho I've heard that LJ is alternately being closed down, being used to infiltrate the US, run by aliens and a form of mind control. Who knows what all else. Typical, I decide I like a thing and it increases the risk of being discontinued. Perhaps I"ll have to look into dreamweaver or what have you. I'd hate it if I finally got back into this only to have it all go poof!

gotta work on my typing skills again,

Friday, May 13th, 2011
5:44 pm
Writer's Block: Let's try this again
What movie would you like to see remade, and why? How would you change it?

Pretty in Pink. Everything would be the same, same actors, everything ( assuming I can go back in time for this. Dream big if you're gonna do it) but in the end Andy chooses The Duck.



Thursday, December 11th, 2008
11:44 pm
Monday, September 1st, 2008
7:05 pm
BWAAHAHAAHAS:LAKSA;hdlAkd ha;lfk znv
Wherein Bee says:

Just ask Sarah Palin!!!!!

Just had to come out of hiding to get that out there. Anyone else find this just too TOOOOOOO
deliciously ironic?


Thursday, January 17th, 2008
6:42 pm
MmmmmPeridot Pie
Wherein Bee says, yup I am still alive even tho I can't update worth a poop. However I am a sucker for Matthew  Michael Whelan's artwork. Huh, I am thunder....qu'ell suprise. I do wish I was something more useful tho. Like, water or something. But I'll just settle for *SHOCK!* and *awwwwwwwww*.


Your Score: Thunder

~ 55% Water ~ 77% Wind ~ 55% Earth ~ 85% Fire ~

Change the street change the decade

Still the longing's left inside...

Your colours are the light blue of the sky and its exact opposite, the fiery crimson. You are likely energetic, ambitious, inquisitive and honest. However, you may sometimes appear insensitive or restless. You could try wearing a Jasper that inspires compassion and tranquillity, or a Peridot that relives irritation and inspires comfort and thus bring you a bit closer to harmony.

In detail:

Your Ground Chakra, which is associated with the element of fire and represents our basic desires and driving force, and your Throat Chakra, which is associated with the element of wind and represents our desire to learn and communicate, are predominant.

Your Creative Chakra, which is associated with the element of earth and represents our need to preserve and grow, and your Heart Chakra, which is associated with the element of water and represents our sense of love and compassion are not quite as prominent.

These are the results you will get if you score highly on...

None of the four elements: Balance Wind: Gust Fire: Blaze Water: River Earth: Valley Wind & Fire: Thunder Wind & Water: Clouds Wind & Earth: Canyon Fire & Earth: Lava Fire & Water: Tornado Water & Earth: Trees Wind, Fire & Earth: Storm Wind, Fire & Water: Stars Wind, Water & Earth: Forest Fire, Water & Earth: Avalanche All four elements: Harmony

My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 99% on water
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 99% on wind
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 99% on earth
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 99% on fire
Monday, May 21st, 2007
11:25 am
This weekend brought to you by the letter "A"

Wherein Bee says:

For aggrivation.

*sigh* This weekend SO did not turn out like I wanted. And really I need to grateful that it was something not so major in my life. I suppose all in all it could have been much worse, given the situation, but still. For starters, my truck's breaks went out-Ish. No, I'm fine, no one was hurt or anything. The break booster went, so while I *could* stop the truck, I had to STAND on the breaks and I needed to start doing that about 100 feet earlier than I wanted to. And then of course that caused the engine to stall, something about the vaccum not being held and too much air or something in the engine. Ugh. Of course this leads to my noticing that really, when power steering was invented I think someone was asleep in the lab that day because hey, when the engine cuts off, the *power* steering doesn't work, and lo' you can not really steer the vehicle. Which ok, great if you are just trying to push the truck off the road, but not so great when you are traveling like 60 and hit the breaks to slow down and no joy there, and then you can't even turn the wheel to avoid smacking into a car/person/alien infront of you. 


Thank! God! Dadbee taught me how to drive in situations like this when I was a larva, because damn. Of course this in and of itself put a major cramp on my weekend. I had clients I needed to take care of ( lord that sounds a bit dodgy heh) pet sitting and such, so it led to a mad scramble to find people that were willing to cart my tail around to the houses to make sure the pets were taken care of. The cleaning jobs got put on hold, which thank goodness I have the best clients in teh world  because they all said, no problem take your time. But I still have to get them taken care of this week, so this will be a bzzzy week  for Bee. So because of the truck croaking, my plans on working on my storage unit didn't happen, the work I wanted to do didn't happen, the fighter practice of DOOOOOOM that I wanted to goto didn't happen. Meh.

Of course I start whinging about how this is just a big pain and my life stinks andandand, and my dear friend calls me and says our plans have to change and we can't go out because he just got a call, and his friend of 25 years was in the hospital. Apparently this guy had a son that was running around with a bad crowd, and he/the mother told the kid to stop it and said that he couldn't do that any more. Jr. apparently left the room, came back and in front of his mother, little sister and little brother, shot his father in the back of the head with a .22.  The kid is 14.

The Universe has an amazing way of reminding you REALLY DAMN FAST that your life is SO not that bad and you best be grateful for what you have, you know?

So yeah. And really what can you say to that? Aside from what the hell is WRONG with kids/people these days where this is an acceptable solution?!!?!?!? I told E that I hope to god they lock this kid up as an adult and never let him out. He still doesn't know if his friend will live and he can't get any clear information on his condition. Makes me sick......and reminds me that my life isn't that bad. I just wish I could take his pain from him tho, or lessen it somehow, but only time will do that, I know that. Still doens't make it easier tho.

Considering that,  my *very small problem* will all work out.  it's a truck, and they can be fixed, and I refuse to have it do otherwise. So things will get better. A teeny bright note, on Friday I get to hug bebe goats again, so life can't be THAT bad can it?  Of course there are the issues with that, namely they keep trying to eat my bandana off my head, they *butt* you whether you are standing or sitting, and really, I'm glad they accept me, but do they all have to gather in a circle and group poop around me? I mean honestly.

Life keeps going....


Current Mood: contemplative
Sunday, May 13th, 2007
11:06 am
Stuff and the thing
Wherein Bee says

So I've been a big ol slug lately wit the cleaning of my own place and the storage unit that I have. I don't have a lot of free ( as in completely) weekends lately, but i do have a day or so where I only have one job in the am. I think I will take a day and go and be mercinary in the unit and toss. Well toss and see if I can't get my shitte together enought to sell it be it at the fleemarket or yard sale. Not sure how a yardsale would be handled if one lives in an apartment tho.  Hm. I suppose I need to consult the management. It hink I'll do that on Monday tho. The weekend "lady" isn't very helpful or pleasent. 

( oh look, another ASLing Idiot. has popped up and it's only 11:am. Here)

So I think I will have to start that project, well, why not on the 19th? That's armed forces day, and well aside from needing to wish certin Gnomes "Happy Day", perhaps I will be inspired.  Ugh, I have a LOT of stuff in there.

( well it's at least trying to talkin full-ish sentances...apparently from france it/he says. Says he's "younger than you, is that a problem?"
the heck? I told him um...not sure how that even matters? Everyone gets born atdifferent times, no biggie. Plus as this person is in france....lord. )

SO I am going to have to harden my heart and just toss. Yes yes, I know, I preach it daily, but to those I preach to, you all know that I acknowledge it's hard. The sad thing is there are things that I DO want to keep, and if my space was bigger like in the old apartment, I"d have it out still.  However there is no room in my tictac box of a home. and I have enough going on in here as it is.  Grrrrrrrrrr. So the time has come. Well, it will come, next Saturday after my job. I think first the flinging of stuff I know I do not want/ need and no one else will, and then the hard part.. What of the rest do I really want to keep and what do I NEED to keep. Meh. I'll need coffee, I know. LOTS of coffee. But it's 70.00 a MONTH, and that's money I can use for....well gas for a start. 45.00 to fill up my little vehicle. Forty. Five. And I am STILL seeing folks driving Ford Extinctions et al on the roads.  How are they doing it? 

( ah he , says he's a he, is being very polite and saying he hopes he's not bothering me but he just thought it would be neat to talk to someone over here, Probably a spy. :P )

I need to start considering maybe getting a new car. Lord. I LOVE my sad little truck, I didn't want to , but there you have it. But if the gas prices continue to go up.....I can't swing 75.00 a week to fill up my tank, regardless of my job. GRRRRRRRRRRRR, stupid government and big oil. We hates you. Ok, enough whinging, it's off to get ready to goto work, Happy Mother's day to all the Kibbie and Pup Mom's out there too ( as well as people moms , but you guys get that already)

hi ho hi ho Tis off to scrub I go!


Current Mood: awake
Friday, May 11th, 2007
8:43 am
Wherein Bee says

I love my friends.

The last entry told you all about the "ASLing" I was getting rather a lot lately, and my how standared response is "80, pre-op, Paraguay". I was talking to my friend S and he said " oh no wait, you need to answer the 12 year olds *like* a 12 year old. Next time someone says ASL? you need to say:  

"12, having it now, Uranus"


" I am in ur butt, having teh sexorz"

Can't. Stop. Giggling.

Thursday, May 10th, 2007
9:44 pm
Wherein Bee says:

Damn, I am pooped. One of my clients yesterday decided it was time to spring clean, and she does it **OLDE SKOOL**. 4.5 hours and all we got to was the washroom, and the kitchen, with vaccuming and such of the rest of the house. Everything came out of every cabinet, and was either washed, condensed, sorted or tossed and all the cabinets were washed out. Her pantry is vast but we got it under control too.

And today I am feeling it. 

Luckily for me, I know a massage therapist that does make house calls, so I believe I am going to get that set up for Saturday. I'd have done it tonight , but I had another client that was from 630-830 so that was out. Plus I needed to stop by the store and buy 3728722983670971 boxes of jello. Red flavour, of course. I have a sweet tooth, I admit that freely,  but I try to keep it under wraps, which is why you won't find a lot of cookies and such in my place, if it's there I will eat it ALL UP. So, it's just easier to not keep them around much. However, last night I SOOOOOOOOOO WANTED SOMETHING SWEET. Sucking my finger wasn't going to get it, and I didn't want to contemplate eating a spoon full of splenda ( EW!) so I've decided that red flavour suger free jello would be a good thing to have on hand. And yay me for finding a close out on it at the food store.

 I loves a sale, really I do. 

Now I just need to start a big bowl of it. Actually,  what I *need*  to do is clean, but much like the cobblers kid's, my place is the last to ever get done. I clean every day now just about, and when I get home the last thing I want to do is clean. Maybe if I hand my neighbor money and tell them to hand it back to me and say clean this place, I could get motivated. Somehow tho I think I'd just know it was my money to begin with. :P

On another note, I have been getting a RASH of folks from "Some Country That Isn't  Mine" (tm)  im-ing me. It's VERY bizzare. First off, I can't figure out how in the world they get my id. One guy ( because they are ALL male, or that's what they say at least, ) said he got it from his boss because I was his bosses niece and we went to school together. Um....ok, so if you "know" I am a niece of your boss Einstine, then why are you asking me  "ASL?ASLASL?!?!!!?!?!?!"

*BZZZZZZZT * try again.

Another told me that he just  "found it on his list and  I had been talking to him for a while." Er.....noooooooo. Again I ask, if you have been talking to me for a while then why do you not know my gender?

My favourite one tho, had to be the really obnoxious/determined guy that kept *BUZZING ME* after every line he wrote ( in really broken english might I add) who KEPT asking me  ASLASLASLASL?!!?!?!!?!! OH DEAR GOD ASL?!?!!?!?!!? and I kept coming up with different phrases for it. He was SO confused....

ASL?  "No, I do not speak American Sign Language. Besides how would you see it? What an odd question."

U R ASL? "No I am not. I'm ABS. Who're you?"

Huh? No, UR ASL. plz. "I told you I am NOT an ASL, how rude, why would you call me that? YOU are an ASL for all I know."


Then he asked if I had a cam with me. And I said no. And he asked again, and I said no again, and he said "PLZ!" and I said "Noz!" and then he said , "what's  UR ASL, UR hot.". Um, kaaaaaaaay, If you know I am "hot" why do you need to know my ASL? Clearly a 5th grade in a desert country just got out, and they just discovered teh intarwebby somewhere, or something. Because damn. But, I took pity on him, and I was bored, so I finally answered his desperate pleas for my ASL?!!?!?!?!

 "80, pre-op, Paraguay".



It was almost sad to spam block him.


Current Mood: accomplished
Tuesday, May 8th, 2007
7:28 am
Bookish thoughts

Wherein Bee says

Isn't it amazing how some things are so overwhelmingly important to some folks and not to others? Ok, so along with cleaning I do pet sitting. Yay pets! ( This afternoon is a bonus round as I get to go clean a farmhouse AND hug a bebe goat. *SKWEEEZ like a 12 yo*  but I noticed something the other day whilst pet sitting for my Eldest Niece. She and her family have moved down here from Va and live about 8 miles from me. The Youngest Niece lives about 20. VERY ODD having family that close, but there it is. So I was watching EN's menagere (  two dogs, two cats, two mice and fish) while they were back up north visiting my sister/ her mom. They have a really new and nice house and they have been in it for a month or so. And the first night I stayed there....I felt....odd. Not scared. mind you, 
1. I grew up in the sticks. 'Nuff Said.
2. I do have a clue about handling bad situations should they arise. 
3. Like anyone could get past the spazmo dogs and my not know it. 

But it was so weird, I just....didn't....feel.....right. I thought about it and thought about it and the next day it hit me.

Where are the books?

There were no books in that house. Oh, the 5 yo  (great niece. ok well more like ok niece, who knows if she will be great or not? She's 5. ) had a few books in her room of the Winnie the Pooh sort. But there were NO. BOOKS.

and it freaked me out. Like, OMG a lot. See, I grew up in a house with books. We had a library. No it was not a huge grand thing, a 10 x 10 room apx, but it had shelves completely along one wall up to the ceiling full of books and low shelves on the other side. My brother had a wall of books in his room, and I had my starter set of a 1/4 of the wall. In fact,  I remember very accurately the wall of books we had in Westbury, before we moved to NC. I was 3 when that happened. Fast forward to now. My brother has probably 1000+ books in his house, all shelved, all read. Over and over. I am pushing  500. ( keep in mind I live in a 760 sqft place.) so, for me to encounter a place with only say 50 books, I'd think, "Oh those poor people, what's wrong?" To see a home with NO books doesn't even compute really.  It got to the point that I actually asked her when I called to tell her how thigns were going, "EN, where are the books?" and she laaaaaaaaaughed...
"Bee we have books, they just aren't out yet. We need to get a book shelf. Don't worry, there will be books. We read, we have books. Not as many as you people, but we do have them. I'll leave one out on the coffee table to make you feel better next time, ok?"  You people....is there a book divide? I think so. Heh, when I was moving in here, my neighbor helped me with some boxes and asked "Do you resell books on ebay?" I looked at him oddly and said, "er....nooooo, why?" He said " Well you just have so many boxes of books."

I'd only brought over 4.

and I had like another 20+ to go.


But what I was getting at with this post was isn't it odd the things (not people, items) that no matter what , you can NOT help but keep around you. And if they are absent, the palpable feeling of missing them is just so unsettling. I think I would die if I had to live in a place with no books. None to touch, or see, or smell, ororor. 


What do you folks have that you would find odd to NOT see in a house?

Off to prep for cleaning. But first I think I'll go hug a book. After I haul a cat off of it.


Monday, May 7th, 2007
11:42 am
Recap the First

Wherein Bee says

Well like I said I'd give fill ins on what happened in the past year so this will be the quick and dirty version. If folks want more they can ask and I will fill in the colours. 

Lessee...badish things. Remember the job I loooooooooved lovedlovedloved? Yeah well, like the good book says, The universe hates folks to be too happy. Ok, not really, but that job I loved got moved, changed, twisted and turned into a poop sandwich basically. The stress and headaches that resulted were horrible, but out of it came a very goodish thing, namely I am self employed. Amazing when you finally make the decision that you are not, simply *are*. *not*. going to tolerate certin behavior ever again, then it's almost like you can feel a layer peeling off of your soul. Ok, that sounded flippy there, but really, it's true. I had one mound of poop flung at me too many and I suddenly had a moment of clarity and I thought, you know what? I do not need this. Really, I am not "proud", and I will find other work. These place stinks and I don't need to wrap myself in it any more. Done. And then I started cleaning houses. Now I'd always done that for extra monies, but now I do it full time and really, I love it. I make my own hours, I see a direct impact on folks lives, I feel that I am bringing some measure of joy to them, the pay is better than what I was making there, and the only poop I hve to deal with is in the toilets. And you know what? That's where it's "supposed" to be. 

Btw, anyone needing cleaning....let me know. I'm always looking for more clients. :D

Another bad thing that happened was I lost my schmoo kitty. My beloved Albacore was 18 when she passed and it nearly split my heart in two. It's been almost a year and I still miss her. However I have my three goober cats now, and as much as I threaten to shove them in boxes and mail them away to the artic, I'd never *REALLY* do that. All are healthy and so that is a good thing.

I finally moved in to an apartment that I L.O.V.E.  loooooooooooooooooooooooove it. it is way smaller that the other place, but there are no meth dealers or dodgy types, at least not in  my building so I consider that a hell of a plus. Plus they don't have insane cat pet rent ect, so that was a huge deal with me. It's cute, it's airy and it's mine. SO long as I keep paying the rent at least. :)

Hm. Tried internet dating, and LET ME TELL YOU.  The number of flakes out there makes me wonder how in the WORLD we have a population problem, because REALLY, there are some damned idiotic men around. Now that being said, I am sure there are insane women too, so that's not a "hates the men" statement, but WOW. OH the stories I have. I could post one a day for two weeks EASY about all the weirdness. Hm maybe I will. But out of that headache came a good friendship and further clarity of what it is that I want. Will I find it? Who knows. Oh but I SO know what it is I do not want. Again, out of the badish comes the goodish.

Lessee, I'm trying to get my sewing back up to speed, finding I have time to do that, I have family not that lives down here ( neices) so perhaps finally getting to know them will happen. (We are very close in age, but never grew up together so we are more like really friendly aquaintences.) I'm sorta looking forward to it. Planning for Pennsic, maybe dragon con, trips to San Fran and Seattle , besically I am having a pretty good life. I kwo there will be thigns that drive me batshitte, but I will come back to this entry and such an remind myself that really, I am SO much better off than I was......

Life is sweet. Like honey.


Sunday, May 6th, 2007
10:03 am
Wherein Bee says

*Creak streeeeeeatchskirtchystreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeatch*

*peeps at clock* 

GOOD GOD. I've been asleep for almost a year? I OVER SLEPT!!!!!!! ARRRRRRGH!!!!!

Actually no. I just suddenly got hit with such an attack of life that for a little while  ( well a year apparently) I didn't have the time for posting. However that has changed, along with a few other aspects of my life, and I shall attempt to up date the world in a few. Suffice it to say, all things are way more goodish than badish, there have been changes, some major, some not, but all is working out as I really believe was meant to. At least for now. :) It could change in 4 minutes, with me who the heck knows? But for now, to go and let doggies out, and then more posting. 

And getting a new clock. Over sleeping by a year, good lord that's just SILLY!

*kisses to all* 

Tuesday, May 9th, 2006
2:55 pm
I live!!!
Wherein Bee says

But I'm busiern' hell....so just a quick bloop to let you know I'm alive

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Knight of Your Heartwarren_ellis
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Money spent on costumes, armor, food, camping $10,675,429
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I can not TELL you how wrong this all is.

Current Mood: busy
Wednesday, April 19th, 2006
10:25 am
Wherein Bee says sorry for the delay in writing!

No, I'm not dead. I just got hit with a 2500+ mailing at work. Thank god it's just a basic thing and no sorting. So just a quick update. Things are healing fine, tho I did have a bit of a scare yesterday. I'm sitting at my desk labling my little heart out, and because my bellybutton is healing (it's where they got in) it's all itchy. So I'm sitting at the desk, and it is *so* quiet, phones aren't ringing for once...just still....

*stick crooked*
"damn it"

wait.....oh thank god...it's just the liquid bandaid goop they put in there.


Dang. If it HAD come out, maybe I could have made my button go *PWEEEEE!* like a balloon!!!!!

HEE! Ok, back to sticking and skritchin'.


Current Mood: amused
Thursday, April 13th, 2006
10:44 am
I'm baaaack!!!
Wherein Bee says

It all went absolutely perfectly. I'm doing just fine, feel great, only a little bit sore in the tummy, like I worked out a little bit too hard, and other than that?


I am, however, going to take a nap now.

Because I can. ;)


Current Mood: accomplished
Tuesday, April 11th, 2006
4:02 pm
20, 20, 24 Hours To GO-O-O
Wherein Bee says less, actually.

Sorry for the lack up udatage, I've been hit with a huge stuffing project at work . Whch sadly is nowhere near as "zany" as that sounds, and in fact doens't even involve a turkey.. But I just wanted to say that in less than 24 hours, ze slashing and burning (but no salting) shall commence. Finally, FINALLY, it's going to be a reality. 7:30 AM I go under. :) So if ya'll could spare a happy thought/prayer/white light ect for me about that time it'd be loverly.

I'll post some tomorrow once I come out of the drugged fog I intend to be in afterwards.



Current Mood: ecstatic
Friday, April 7th, 2006
2:28 pm
Wherein Bee says there is an irony here...

bzzzyb will have to write:

I will stop cyber stalking all of my ex’s

'What will you have to write on the chalk board?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Current Mood: giggly
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